Ok before I move on I really really want to highlight how important body language is. So before you guys read on please hopefully get this right 1st and understand other people's body language. Any questions about this please tell me as this is key to conversation.
Here are some examples of bad body language. Sure its not the best videos but haha.I had fun making them. All of the videos below are based on my friends(or are they?). Im going to say I dunno them at all.lol
Ok this is suppose to be bad body language so let's study this dumb ass(green shirt guy). HAH!no offense ah mathan. As you see no eye contact at all, means he is not interested.Like duh.lol and he is not even sitting straight. and his legs are not even facing Ryzzal(the black shirt guy). It is said the feets point the direction you want to go and if your legs are not facing him/her means your not interested(we're filtering out other factors like not straight body posture bcz he is tired or his legs are at other direction cause he is disabled)haha!
Ok this is is suppose to be good body language. Look at the yellow shirt guy. wow!he is so good.LOL. Straight body posture. Eye contact. Feet pointing towards the person. And he give his full attention to the Mathan(green shirt guy). Look how much fun their conversation is O.O ...You can actually sense his body language is so good that people next to them Ryzzal(black shirt) and Wilson (blue shirt) actually sense the aura and play some scissors paper stone or something. See how fun it is.zzz im talking rubbish.
Ok some people comment me it looks like a porn video because actually it zoom below the waist then the face then below the waist again. Yea I think so too haha. So next time any of you thinking of making porn video please contact me. I can video cam for you ty.
Day 4-E65F
Ok before I move on I want talk about the 3 aspects of us which is the body, the conscious mind and the unconscious mind.
DAY 2 -E66E
DAY 3 -E65K
1st thing 1st. WTH!!! Change class every day?? RP, we as students already have alot of our studies to remember. Changing our class everyday isn't exactly going to increase our memory scale so we don't need any of it thanks. Changing our time to make shorter breaks? Shorter breaks means less time to research means less productive work hence lesser grades. And it also means lesser time to eat!! For me, I'm a slow eater so it will be troublesome for me.Way to go RP. Way to go to make our lives more stress. I salute your work. Let’s try to look at the brighter side. I get to meet new people and meet old friends in my class...O what the heck, I HATE RP! I HATE THE NEW SYSTEM!! I HATE YOU!!!
If RP had a face...I would make sure it will end up like this
Ok go play dota . Ciaossu
I now concluded that law of attraction has worked for me yet again. Few months ago,I've been wondering, hmm how nice it would be to have a bicycle since I haven't got my license yet. Then I can go to places easier. I asked,belief and now I've receive a new bicycle. hah! My parents bought 4 bicycle for each of my siblings.wot!! alhamdulillah .thanks parents. Yea yea I noe. I didn't draw the bike,or shine a torch light on it under the tent,or watch it from outside a shop and not think of it beside the river bay but yet it works(those who watch "the secret" video will noe what I'm talking).haha!So ask belief and you shall receive.
I leave something for you guys to ponder upon : The moon may be bright, but the sea is brighter yet the brightest is the sand of the night . Please note its rubbish.
Procrastination thinking: Change it to:
1. Fear failure 1.Desire accomplishment
2.Avoid discomfort 2.Seek opportunity
3.Think that later is better 3.Remove the thinking and take a proactive step
Example when you want to talk with a stranger;an attractive girl perhaps.Definitely this thoughts will appear in your mind (1.what if she doesn't want to talk with me,ignore me?). Then you imagine how awkward it would be to talk to her and how uncomfortable it would be and you will say "maybe next time".
Try saying to yourself "Hey I want her to be mine. I will suceed. I will go there and have fun chatting with her" [Imagine the scene how nice it would be and go for it]
How you use it in life? Example you've just graduate from law school then you suddenly have the interest to be a zookeeper. What most people will say is you wasted your time and $ at law school. No...you gain experience, learn alot and made friends and thats not a freaking waste of time. Persue it now! and achieve for your best.
In my earlier post about body language, there is a book The Power of Body Language by Tonya Reiman which I highly recommended going in very deep about body language if you want to find out more.
More tips, comment or question comment me.
As we went up the lift (the hell is on top strangely), shiver went down our spine except for Pei Si. She couldn’t wait to face him. I knew then on she could be the one. There was a prophecy saying that a day will come where the HE will be defeated by someone. She led us wielding a pencil and notebook. What have we done to deserve this? What is going to happen to us? These questions filled our soul itself. We opened the door to hell and there he was. The devil himself. He stared at us unleashing his aura of fury. We were helpless as he questioned us for what seems like an hour. Pei Si was engaging him.
Finally he stopped and gave us the formula. We were happy it was over .The devil was tamed. We didn’t suspect it was all a trap. How foolish we were...He unleashed his Cursed Poison upon us saying “Tell me how to arrive at the formula and tell me by tomorrow or I will downgrade your FYP”. This was in devil language. In English is translated “Bring me the scroll before the sunsets tomorrow or all of you will suffer with me in hell. Some of us almost died on the spot. So now we must find out the explanation formula before HE downgrade us for tomorrow. Was the prophecy false??I knew there was a reason I past my O level...it was to make me torture to FYP under his hands. God we pray to you...Destroy this devil u created. Save us from FYP and HIM.
***Please note HE(who must not be speak about) lurks around in RP lab. Take extra caution when entering the lab and don’t look him directly in the eye...he capture souls with it and stored them in test tube***
Let’s break it down. Why do we have lack of confidence? Because we think we are not good enough. We think we are not perfect. Yea you can look yourself in the mirror and find millions of way to criticise yourself. Because we are scared. We are scared the person on the other side will heck care, ignore us or even worst...give us the look especially when we talk with strangers...thinking we are strange. We reject ourselves as a person. Hence we fear REJECTION. There are tips for you to boost your self confidence
**Please note that you must synchronize with yourself. What do I mean? There are 3 part of a human being. The body, the conscious mind and the unconscious mind. For example if I plan to be happy , In your mind perhaps you feel happy, maybe thinking the first time you achieve success in something but then your body gives off a different expect of this. Example it’s slouching or something. Hence your unconscious mind will perceive it as your sad and you will feel sad and can’t be happy. If you feel happy and example you do things like jump around, smiling, doing happy things with your body, your unconscious mind will perceive your happy and hence you will feel happy.
Tips to increase your self confidence
1. Positive thinking –how to be positive thinking? Stop thinking negative thoughts. Stop using these words (no, can’t, don’t, not).These negative words. I can explain it in scientific terms that your brain will perceive a sentence like “I am NOT ugly” as “I am ugly” because it confuses it. If you want me talk about it more, comment me. This is the unconscious mind doing its thing. Start rephrasing your sentence like “I am pretty/handsome instead of I am not ugly” or “I can do it instead of I will not fail”. Catch yourself saying negative thoughts and change them
2. Learn and love about yourself – find out who you are. Please do this. Find out top 5 of the most important thing in your life. Write it down. Find out ten things you like and hate(feelings like “like happy” “hate frustration”) and ten things you want to achieve in life. Slowly start think of ways to achieve them. START NOW. It’s ok to crawl just as long as you don’t stop! Once you learn more of yourself you will appreciate yourself more.
3. Stop the blame game- Something goes wrong. Blame no one. Say to yourself what can I learn from this? I know it’s hard; even I use to have trouble. Example your mum died(sorry thinking of worst scenario) it’s ok to feel sad but shorten the time. You can learn not to take this for granted and try best to move on followed by something positive like (At least no1 can boss me around)”that’s just sick. Or when you mess up a project. Learn what you have done wrong. “oh well at least I learn ....”
4. Be generous- DO things for others even the smallest things, start donating and volunteer( if possible). Volunteering especially can increase your self confidence sky high. You WILL feel good after doing it too.
5. Be more active - Stop sitting in front of your com and doing nothing. Engage your life. Go hiking, mountain climbing, cycling. This will also help you change that your life is boring
6. Solutions- something goes wrong. Think of a good solution. Good way to do this is just to be away for a few minutes and cool down after which you think of a solution that is fair. Don’t think when your feelings are negative(angry ,sad etc)
7. Groom yourself- wear nice clothes and stuff. Wow you do look nice
8. Look in the mirror – EVERYDAY when you look in the mirror in the morning say things like” I look so handsome” “I’m so confident”. After awhile you will feel that way about yourself as you unconscious mind will perceive you as confident or good-looking and work its way to make you be or feel that way.
9. Do things that you have been delaying
10. Take care of your body- well it is part of you. Remember if your body is not synchronizing with other aspects then it’s no use. Eat healthy, exercise, have enough sleep
Changes will not be an overnight...take months. For myself I took around 3-5 months. I can say it in scientific terms because the neurotransmitter in your brain need time to rewire and restructure your thinking. So please don’t give up.
It’s good to have supportive people with you by your side. It helps a freaking whole lot.
I note some people noting me that it is quite wordy. Well I apologise for that as I need to give detailed information. I use to try and find ways and tips to change but I can’t get it because the resources are not detailed enough. And even those books on changing these are quite thick and some of them never even mention most of the things I will be touching on. So I hope you guys understand. If you guys want more tips, want to comment or ask questions just comment me.
1.Body-hands, legs etc
2.Conscious mind-the part in your mind where you can talk without speaking
3.Unconscious mind- you don’t know it is even a part of you but it exist in your mind. You can’t control it but can manipulate it. It will set out to do what has been set up for it.
Have you ever seen those people who can survive for so long in harsh condition? Perhaps David Blaine and the mind freak guy do the stunts they do and can stand it? It’s all in the mind. They can fool their unconscious mind and make it think the other way around.
Example a man who was made to put in a container filled with water and lots of ice...0 degrees I think. Yet he survives there for an hour and came out fine. First the body, he control it to not shiver(I think it is a sign that your cold as the body shakes to produce heat) . Hence by not shivering and staying still, the body says “hey I’m fine, not cold at all”...the conscious mind can then be saying “hey it’s so warm in here (of course requires a lot of will power) hence after awhile the unconscious mind will be fooled into thinking everything is fine and hence will not feel cold.
Another example, you can use is keep on believing that you can ace in your studies. You keep saying you’re smart and do smart things with your body (I have no idea what it is; just an example). Overtime your unconscious mind will belief you are smart and will do things to make you smart. Of course you must make the effort to study too. I’m not going in depth here but if you want me to, just comment me.
Remember 3 of this, must synchronize with each other in order to work. Body language I talked about earlier, conscious mind, I will touch later and unconscious mind. Any comment or questions please comment thanks.
Have you ever talk with someone and felt he or she doesn’t give a shit even though they are listening? And when you talk with someone else you feel they care and listen so much to you. You feel he/she care for you and willing to listen and after some time, you will more likely talk with the person more about yourself in a depth level. Why? 1 major reason for this is their non-verbal cues. If you have good body language people will definitely be more open and talk with you.
I can give you a list of body language of people but it is you must also take into account the situation and apply it correctly. Example I can tell you that crossing your hands means the person is disclose and like to be defensive. But it could be just that he or she is cold. So I’ll give a list here or what most of the time people body language means
http://www.synergyinstituteonline.com/detail_article.php?artid=173
I know there is a lot. Just take a look at remember some. Sometimes you yourself can detect something is wrong through their gestures
People especially women unconsciously or consciously pick up non-verbal cues. Here I will give a bit of information from my future post. For guys, how do you know whether the girl like you or not? How do you know when is the time to ask her to be your girlfriend? Read her body language
http://www.mamashealth.com/relationships/girlinto.asp
http://www.buzzle.com/articles/how-to-know-if-a-girl-likes-you.html
When you know she already like you, take your time (but not too long) come up with something sweet to ask her the question. And please don’t make it the boring old way. Come up with something unique. I love to give examples but I need them for myself thanks. Haha
Other people : take notice of their body language and stir the conversation to the right direction. Example you talk about school and they start giving not interested verbal gestures like moving their feet, playing with their hand with item, keep looking at other places instead of you. Usually it means they are not interested . Then you decide ok they don’t like talking about this and talk about shopping. Suddenly their eyes open up more and she show so much enthusiasm. Her feet points towards you, smiling etc. There you hit the spot. Talk more about it.
You: smile, feet pointing at them, listen attentively, don’t do the above things like looking elsewhere(keep eye contact) etc. Be interested to what they want to say. Because no matter how hard you try, even if you follow these good body language, people can sense the aura of “boring” in you. I will give some tips on how to be interested in other people on later posts.
*you can try*People like to talk with people who are like them, unconsciously so try mirroring them. Their posture, their breathing pace, voice tone and speed, legs and hands position etc. Do what they do, example scratch head. When you want to check whether they are “into” the conversation with you or not, try moving anything. Example; move your hands from the table to your lap. They will unconsciously follow you and move his hands to his lap too. That’s when you know whether you’re in rapport or not.
With this, people sense your interest and will be more willing to open up with you. Remember always be enthusiastic and happy. People get attracted by this aura unconsciously. It requires time so don’t expect result in just 1-2 days...May even take months but eventually there will be result.
So if you guys have any comment or questions please post it. There are more verbal cues that you can look out more and more examples I can give but I’m too lazy to type it down. So yea... if you want more list and example comment me and I will post it in my coming posts.
Whether your talking with your friends, buying things from the grocery or even rambling in your head,, all of it focus on a point. COMMUNICATION. Here is the formula for communication.
90%non-verbal + 10% verbal = communication
90% non-verbal hence means u better watch your body movements and others.Its the key to success. 10% is verbal so...i dunno.yea its what you talk. I will talk to you more about this next time.Ways to spot other non-verbal and watch yours ,and hope to communicate better. My friends say don't post so much because lazy comment so I cannot post alot today...
Qn: Why 90% and 10%? I have no idea...thats what everyone says
Qn: So I just read the above and I'm ready to catch chicks and be popular? Above is just definition...
Qn: Everyone knows about this.. Your friends might not
Qn: Why is the sky blue? er....
Qn:Why do u hate blogs? Because I just don't
Qn:Why don't I just make a book? I'm freaking lazy
Qn:Why are you doing this? Told you because I'm tired of seeing so many fail
Qn: Why? Why what
If anything can just leave me a comment or something. I would love to help out if you have any enquiries also. I hope this is like those youtube you can leave comments.(sorry i'm really new to blogs)