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Jidi(unknown)

About my life in red font. Attracting and make people like you (opposing sex too) will be in black font.[Read from the start of the blog,its like a book]{starts at March 6 2009}

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Ok guys I want talk about confidence today. I planned to talk about this in the future post but seem a lot of people been having this problem so I will just talk about it now.

Let’s break it down. Why do we have lack of confidence? Because we think we are not good enough. We think we are not perfect. Yea you can look yourself in the mirror and find millions of way to criticise yourself. Because we are scared. We are scared the person on the other side will heck care, ignore us or even worst...give us the look especially when we talk with strangers...thinking we are strange. We reject ourselves as a person. Hence we fear REJECTION. There are tips for you to boost your self confidence

**Please note that you must synchronize with yourself. What do I mean? There are 3 part of a human being. The body, the conscious mind and the unconscious mind. For example if I plan to be happy , In your mind perhaps you feel happy, maybe thinking the first time you achieve success in something but then your body gives off a different expect of this. Example it’s slouching or something. Hence your unconscious mind will perceive it as your sad and you will feel sad and can’t be happy. If you feel happy and example you do things like jump around, smiling, doing happy things with your body, your unconscious mind will perceive your happy and hence you will feel happy.


Tips to increase your self confidence
1. Positive thinking –how to be positive thinking? Stop thinking negative thoughts. Stop using these words (no, can’t, don’t, not).These negative words. I can explain it in scientific terms that your brain will perceive a sentence like “I am NOT ugly” as “I am ugly” because it confuses it. If you want me talk about it more, comment me. This is the unconscious mind doing its thing. Start rephrasing your sentence like “I am pretty/handsome instead of I am not ugly” or “I can do it instead of I will not fail”. Catch yourself saying negative thoughts and change them

2. Learn and love about yourself – find out who you are. Please do this. Find out top 5 of the most important thing in your life. Write it down. Find out ten things you like and hate(feelings like “like happy” “hate frustration”) and ten things you want to achieve in life. Slowly start think of ways to achieve them. START NOW. It’s ok to crawl just as long as you don’t stop! Once you learn more of yourself you will appreciate yourself more.

3. Stop the blame game- Something goes wrong. Blame no one. Say to yourself what can I learn from this? I know it’s hard; even I use to have trouble. Example your mum died(sorry thinking of worst scenario) it’s ok to feel sad but shorten the time. You can learn not to take this for granted and try best to move on followed by something positive like (At least no1 can boss me around)”that’s just sick. Or when you mess up a project. Learn what you have done wrong. “oh well at least I learn ....”

4. Be generous- DO things for others even the smallest things, start donating and volunteer( if possible). Volunteering especially can increase your self confidence sky high. You WILL feel good after doing it too.

5. Be more active - Stop sitting in front of your com and doing nothing. Engage your life. Go hiking, mountain climbing, cycling. This will also help you change that your life is boring

6. Solutions- something goes wrong. Think of a good solution. Good way to do this is just to be away for a few minutes and cool down after which you think of a solution that is fair. Don’t think when your feelings are negative(angry ,sad etc)

7. Groom yourself- wear nice clothes and stuff. Wow you do look nice

8. Look in the mirror – EVERYDAY when you look in the mirror in the morning say things like” I look so handsome” “I’m so confident”. After awhile you will feel that way about yourself as you unconscious mind will perceive you as confident or good-looking and work its way to make you be or feel that way.

9. Do things that you have been delaying

10. Take care of your body- well it is part of you. Remember if your body is not synchronizing with other aspects then it’s no use. Eat healthy, exercise, have enough sleep

Changes will not be an overnight...take months. For myself I took around 3-5 months. I can say it in scientific terms because the neurotransmitter in your brain need time to rewire and restructure your thinking. So please don’t give up.

It’s good to have supportive people with you by your side. It helps a freaking whole lot.

I note some people noting me that it is quite wordy. Well I apologise for that as I need to give detailed information. I use to try and find ways and tips to change but I can’t get it because the resources are not detailed enough. And even those books on changing these are quite thick and some of them never even mention most of the things I will be touching on. So I hope you guys understand. If you guys want more tips, want to comment or ask questions just comment me.